


Good luck trying to return me

by Crytober



Category: Riverdale (TV 2017)
Genre: Drunk Betty, F/M, I don’t always write bughead but when I do..., Inspired by a tumblr post that I saw at 12:36 AM, crack and humor, it’s usually crack, married bughead, poor juggie lmao
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-26
Updated: 2019-01-26
Packaged: 2019-10-16 10:43:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 220
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17548169
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Crytober/pseuds/Crytober
Summary: “What are you doing?!” He yells, the serpents around them are watching all giddy with wide smiles at what’s going on in front of him. Hell his dad is laughing his ass off in the corner.She stares him dead in the eye, her big green eyes stare into his. Searching his soul, ranging it, picking at it.And she says only but one thing,“Good luck trying to return me without the receipt”And their marriage certificate goes up in flames.





	Good luck trying to return me

**Author's Note:**

> This is so stupid and short but I couldn’t resist making this

So...

Betty has maybe, quite  _ possibly  _ gotten just the  _ littlest  _ too drunk at the wyrm after their wedding.

It wasn’t all her fault. It’s her wedding! She’s allowed to get sloppy drunk and go Have married sex with her  _ husband. _

She feels so giddy saying that

* * *

“Betty!” Jughead yelled, distress clear in his voice as his now wife stands by the fire pit with their marriage certificate looming over the fire.

“What are you doing?!” He yells, the serpents around them are watching all giddy with wide smiles at what’s going on in front of him. Hell his dad is laughing his ass off in the corner.

She stares him dead in the eye, her big green eyes stare into his. Searching his soul, ranging it, picking at it.

And she says only but one thing,

“Good luck trying to return me without the receipt”

And their marriage certificate goes up in flames

* * *

“And that sir, is why we need a new one.” Jughead says, holding up Betty’s hand showing off her ring with a wide smile while Betty hides her face with her free hand.

“Right” the man says who’s supposed to give them a new one. Or however that works.

“Try not to burn this one please…”

Betty makes a small scream in the bottom of her throat.


End file.
